What's the worst parking job you've ever seen?

"sm70- why not Duesenberg?" (sm70-whynotduesenberg) 06/15/2015 at 18:15 • Filed to: None

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For those of you who didn’t see it on the Oppo Facebook page, yesterday I found this winner who had parked their 2015 S550 in such a way that it blocked three parking spaces at a busy restaurant. Well, two if you found someone in a small enough car who didn’t give a fuck to park to the left of the Benz. The day before there was this !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! that couldn’t fit in a single space at all, presumably because BMW. Neither of these were a case of “I drive a super nice car and don’t want door dings.” They were both, at least in my judgmental mind, some combination of laziness, arrogance, and incompetence. It’s also by no stretch the worst parking job I’ve ever seen. So what’s your worst? Pictures would be nice, but if not, do your best storytelling. What is the most inconsiderate, inconvenient, or utterly ridiculous and stupid place you’ve seen someone choose to leave their car? Of course, you all may be competing for second behind !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!

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Try to keep these to something you or someone you know saw in person. Don’t just Google stuff. Also, since I’ve picked on Mercedes and BMW, here’s another picture I took. Yes, that’s my car. Some students at my school had been !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , so on the last day of school I parked like this. Only long enough to take a picture, though ;)

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G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:18

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7 years ago, I saw a dude take up four spots with his C6. No SR20, because I didn't have my camera on me.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 06/15/2015 at 18:19

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That’s impressive. They are wide cars, but still. I take it he was in the front corner of two and the back corner of two?

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:19

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Nope. He parked diagonally.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 06/15/2015 at 18:20

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O_O

crowmolly > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:20

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Years back one of my neighbors parked on the front lawn of another neighbor. Excuse given was that it was snowy and their driveway was obscured.

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:21

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And, wait for it, they were the four spots closest to the west entrance.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 06/15/2015 at 18:21

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Of course.

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:23

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Two of them were handicap spots, and two of them were expectant mother spots. And then there was the time when I saw a school bus take up 6 spots at the mall, but they were in the far corner, so it wasn't as douchey.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 06/15/2015 at 18:24

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Wow. Dickwad corvette driver is a dickwad.

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:26

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To be fair, his daughter (or trophy wife) was pregnant. But still...

Alex B > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:27

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The worst I’ve probably seen is 4 spots with a BRZ at BJ’s.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:38

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Most of the bad parking I see has to do with people trying to back into the spot.

You could fit a Smart in that gap.

Takuro Spirit > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:40

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My own

Rainbow > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:44

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These are two of the closest spaces to my theater. On the opening weekend of something I forgot. Usually I park at the top of the deck to leave the better spaces for customers, but I wasn’t going to let this guy get away with it.

Also, the Jeep in the background is entirely on hash marks in front of a fire hose.

Short-throw Granny Shifter is 2 #blessed 2b stressed > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:45

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That video of the DC congresswomen parking.

In person; I used to see a lot of 1 wheel on the curb parkjobs at the Delaware Country court house down the street from my office.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Short-throw Granny Shifter is 2 #blessed 2b stressed 06/15/2015 at 18:46

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I remember her.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Takuro Spirit 06/15/2015 at 18:52

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The first step is to admit you have a problem.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 06/15/2015 at 18:53

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Leave it on the wheelchair ramp, why dontcha?

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 18:53

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Dude posted a picture of his Disco 4 taking up 4 spaces because he didn’t want “dings in his doors” on a Land Rover Enthusiast fb page. I banned him then and their. Fucking entitled asshole thought he was in the right for doing it too. If you’re worried about dents in your Land Rover, YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG!

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > crowmolly 06/15/2015 at 18:53

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We had that once but it was a car crash.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 19:07

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That top one was two inches away from being parked in a crosswalk.

3R4D > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 19:12

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At a chiropractor I frequent due to someone turning in front of me without looking.

Shour, Aloof and Obnoxious > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 21:09

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Caught this one two days ago. Confused the hell out of me.

facw > 3R4D 06/15/2015 at 22:06

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Asshole Parking bro-truck guy probably took it as a compliment though, or at least was pleased to piss someone off.

AM > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 22:21

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To be honest, I parked like this the entire weekend. My excuse for the bad parking is that I had my grandparents car and it was depressing to drive.

Matsayz > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/15/2015 at 23:27

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sellphones2493 > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/16/2015 at 10:38

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This is at some rest stop in central Italy.

WesBarton89 - The Way to Santa Fe > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/16/2015 at 11:07

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No picture, but when I worked at a grocery store, probably 7 or 8 years ago, there was a second-gen Mitsubishi Eclipse with lambo doors and bad rims, red and lime green paint job, parked diagonally across four spaces. I see the guy get out. Flat brimmed cap, Monster energy drink, sunglasses, and a sleeveless top. He thought he was the coolest person ever. The manager made him park it properly though.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/16/2015 at 11:35

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My last day of school, I took the last 3 parking spots on the side of the school that we parked, because I knew my friend was running late.

daender > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/16/2015 at 11:40

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Nature sucks at parking multiple cars at once.

x87172 > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/16/2015 at 11:41

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She had no idea, just pulled in, went into the store and came out like 30 min later.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 06/16/2015 at 11:43

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Backing in is the correct method of parking. Unless there’s a possibility of pulling straight through.

Pixel > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/16/2015 at 11:47

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No photo because is was over 10 years ago, but I was going to TGIF with some friends(because they wanted to drink $1 beers on the patio *shudder*).

As I approach the building I spot two spaces next to each other right by the patio, with a car about to turn into one of them. I figure this is perfect as I’ll snag the other one. She then proceeds to park about 25% of her car in one and 75% in the other, get out and join her friends at a table on the patio right by the spaces.

I decide “fuck this noise” & have my friends get out and guide me, and proceed to back my battered station wagon into the space she is 25% in, so close that the edge of her driver’s mirror is about 1” away from my car and my driver’s mirror is 1” away from her car, with the mirrors actually overlapping. All while she and her friends are watching slack-jawed.

Once I have my car parked I open the sunroof, climb out onto the wagon’s roof, walk down to the back of the car, step from the roof to the patio rail, jump down on the patio and plunk myself in a chair at the empty table next to hers, while my friends walk around through the entrance and join me.

She never said anything to me, but finished her one drink quickly, crawled into her car from the passenger side and spent 20min getting out of the space without hitting my car.

Takuro Spirit > daender 06/16/2015 at 11:47

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But it does a good job at destroying donk’d Impalas

spanfucker retire bitch > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/16/2015 at 11:59

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I’m using two photos, taken at two different times to try and describe how much of a worthless prick this driver was, so bear with me. This is what the parking lot looked like when I lived at this Apartment complex. Minus the water and clogged drainage.

The parking spaces end where I’ve drawn those wondefully straight orange lines. If you park where the “DOUCHEBAG” sign is, you have the potential to block that entire entrances/exit for that side of the apartment complex. But, people have parked there before without completely blocking the ingress and egress. It’s a dick move, but you can do it without impeding smaller cars (you’re still a fuck though).

However one Saturday afternoon when I went to go some grocery shopping, I noticed this fucking Hyundai parked there. Except this douche canoe was parked about 3 feet away from that orange line underneath the douchebag signage. What that did was essentially create a bottleneck so small that not even my Mazda3 could get through. In fact, only a bike or motorcycle could get through how small that gap was.

Where I’m standing is where that parking line is. Look how far that fucker parked away from it. I even tried calling the building staff to see if they could tow the car, but they told me that the owners of the company that owned the apartment complex would have to ask for that. I was absolutely livid.

spanfucker retire bitch > Pixel 06/16/2015 at 12:07

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I truly want to believe this happened.

Pixel > spanfucker retire bitch 06/16/2015 at 12:25

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This was the wagon in question. 750+ different quotes and sayings written all over it in silver paint pen.

I tended to do whatever crazy idea lept into my head while driving it as I already looked like a weirdo just for driving it.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 06/16/2015 at 13:09

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Yes but clearly not everyone is capable of it.

spanfucker retire bitch > Pixel 06/16/2015 at 13:13

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That’s uh...that’s something alright.

ChampagneChariot > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 06/16/2015 at 13:49

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I once saw someone at an airport who had hit someone’s car while parking and left their car pinned up against the one they hit. I had a picture of it on my old phone, it was ridiculous.